“Pinkyyyyyy! I want Pinkyyyyyyy!”
My youngest is a loud child anyway. But when she starts wailing…
well, I wonder whether earplugs might be a good investment.
And yet, I couldn’t help but sympathize with her. She was devastated because I had taken away her beloved Pinky.
The way she was carrying on, one would think I had removed the smallest digit on her hand, rather than the small but well-loved piece of fabric she had slept with since infancy.
I probably wouldn’t mind if she held on to Pinky longer. But Pinky seems to be tied pretty closely with thumb-sucking for my four-year-old sweet girl. And the thumb-sucking needs to stop.
That, and said four-year-old often loses Pinky in the middle of the night, resulting in…
you guessed it: wailing. Loud enough to wake. The. Dead.
The thing is, she loves Pinky, and she is quite certain that she can’t sleep without it. Pinky is what she looks for when she’s bored. It’s what she turns to when she’s sad. It’s what she clings to when she’s mad. Pinky has helped her cope through many heartaches and fears.
In short, Pinky has become a crutch. An object my daughter imagines she can’t survive without. Something that claims my girl’s dependency.
And after enduring that first of many tantrums my daughter threw in her vain attempts to get Pinky back, I started thinking about how she’s really not that different from most adults I know…myself included.
None of us would ever sing, “In coffee alone, my hope is found.”
(I feel blasphemous even writing that sentence.)
Yet I wonder if that’s the exact impression I gave my oldest daughter when she saw me kissing the single remaining K-cup in my favorite flavor this morning. (What can I say? I thought we were out.)
Or when my monthly “must-have-chocolate” obsession strikes.
Or what about when I’ve had a tough day and I just want to escape into a good book?
No, none of these things are wrong in and of themselves. I want to make that absolutely clear.
It’s more about where my heart is. Where my security lies. Where my dependency clings.
I’m happy to report that my little one has been managing to sleep without Pinky with no trouble. She barely even asks for it anymore. And with that big step, she has become just a little more mature.
I wonder what habits are hindering my own heights of spiritual maturity.
O Lord, open our eyes and convict our spirits of those things that replace You as our strongest craving, our fiercest desire, and our only dependency! May our souls thirst for you alone! May we share this testimony with David:
For God alone my soul waits in silence; from Him comes my salvation.
He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be greatly shaken.
For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. (Psalm 62)
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Jennifer. This was amazing. First, you’re a really great writer. Second, thank you for this rebuke. We may not sing “in coffee alone” but we often live it. Last night, I was realizing more and more that “in money alone, my hope is found” and that was totally discouraging. I’m glad I’m aware but I want to do better and be better. Thank you for such a timely message. God bless you! This truly blessed me.
Hi, Dani! Thanks so much for your kind words. It’s a joy to have opportunities to share what God is teaching me. You bring up an excellent point! It’s very easy to place our trust in money, rather than the One who provides for all our needs. And from my own experience, we often don’t even realize we’re doing it until the supply is threatened in some way. Thanks for identifying with my heart on this issue!
Christie, your post gives such a beautiful illustration of dependency on the Lord! As I think through the day, many things distract and draw me as if my life depended on them. Ugh! Your heartfelt words remind me to be more attentive to even the smallest of details. Thanks for sharing this!
Hi, Sharon! Thanks so much for reading, and for identifying with my heart in this post. May God direct our gazes ever more steadfastly on Him alone!
Wonderful article! And such a “ouch” example of coffee.. because it is so very true some mornings… Thank you for sharing this encouragement on the Art of Home-Making Mondays! Please join us again this week!
Thanks so much for having me! It’s a true blessing to be able to share how God is working in my heart.