Marriage And Friendship – Practical Tips for Becoming Your Spouse’s BFF

Yesterday we chatted about Ruth – it reminded me of how much I love her story! – but it also brought to light a basic fact about marriage. Marriage is easier, and more worthwhile, when you have friendship with your spouse. After all who wants to go on weekend getaways with a grouch they can’t stand, let alone face the day to day challenges that face every marriage? If you raised your hand and your content to be frenemies with your hubby then you can skip this post, but if being able to call your husband your best friend appeals to you then pick some of these ideas below to create and curate friendship in your marriage!

1. Start a board game stash and try to play a deck or board game with your spouse once a week. Make sure to laugh at blunders!
2. Pick a Practical Way to Bless Your Husband – this develops genuine friendship. (Thanks for the great list Kaylene!)
3. Buy your husband a new Bible. Engrave his name on it and have your kids sign their name in the back flap. He’ll love the thoughtfulness!
4. Over the weekend make him a week’s worth on Pinwheel lunches with his favorite ingredients. He’ll think about your gift of time every day at lunch time!
5. Send him at least one loving or flirty text message every day! Make sure you mean every word.
6. Write him a love letter! If this idea stumps you, don’t worry, Rosann has fabulous ideas to get you started!
7. Start taking selfies! This is a great idea for a couple who have criss-crossed schedules. Send him pics of you smiling, being goofy or better yet with a sensual pose. Ask him to send you one back!
8. Try something new. Recently Paul and I tried our hand at disc golf; we have a free course in our area so it was free, fun and we had a good time chuckling at our lack of skill.
9. On your hubby’s day off ask him to help you a cook a cultural themed meal from a destination of his choice. You’ll get to try delicious new recipes and daydream together a bit. I bet Paul would have a hard time choosing.
10. Try a text blitz! Send a series of short texts designed to bring a smile to your man’s face! I do this often on Mondays, which for Paul is often the most stressful day of the week.
11. Being your hubby’s bff might be challenging if your sex life is struggling. Find ways to let him know that you are trying AND work on your sex life together. Posts like Kayse’s on Keeping Romance Alive Even When You Have Little Ones might be a good place to start!
12. Interrogate him. Huh?! Just kidding. Have a fun late night talk and pick his brain about his daydreams, his secret wishes. Having you on his team might be the thing he has been thirsting for. Take this one step further by searching out ways to help him pursue his dreams.
13. Find a local masseuse who gives private lessons. Ask her to teach you some simple massage techniques. You and hubby can learn a few and use them on each other. This is a great way to show physical love to one another that can be but doesn’t have to be about sex.
14. I love Ashley’s idea of reading together as a couple! Paul and I do a daily devotional (this one right now) but we’ve never tried reading fiction together. It’s one more way to spend time together!
15. Initiate sex. If making your best friend’s day is as easy as being eager for him then this one thing can be the easiest and funnest thing you can do for your marriage.
16. Refresh your husband yearly by lavishing him with love. This list to make his birthday a day to remember is a great jumpstart! Thanks Janine!
17. Work out together. Ever heard of an accountability partner? When your spouse is your AP you can do more for each other than if you pursue goals alone. Don’t make it about pounds, make it about living and moving together. If working out isn’t your thing maybe a stretching routine or a daily walk will suffice.
18. Build up your man. And he’ll probably respond in kind. Little side note – my husband wears a tool belt every day, but I never get to see it because well he’s at work and I’m at home. Recently while helping with a weekend building project I saw him wearing a toolbelt and it was sexy to me. I told him so and how much I loved that manly side of him. It was one little way to get closer to him.
19. Worship together. If you are one of those couples who both serve actively in your church, take a few weeks off from your posts and worship together. You can even ask an older teen to sit with you and help keep your kiddos distractions down to a minimum. Holding hands and praying and praising together will go a long way to rebuild and realign your marriage.
20. I  love iMom’s list of compliments to dole out on your hubby. Such an easy way to speak friendship into your marriage.
21. Leave him alone. Say what? Ever had a friend who just needed you take her kids for a few hours so she could get some restorative peace? Periodically take the honey-do list off your man’s plate. He may decide to do the same for you or not, but he’ll notice that you understand he needs breaks every now and then.
22. Pray together. Praying for your man is great but hearing one another voice prayers over your marriage can go far towards pulling you together. Start here if you’re new to prayer.
23. Be silly. Make time during the week to show your man that you aren’t always serious. Here are easy goof off ways to make your husband smile at work.
24. Laugh often. Search pinterest for funny memes that you can giggle about together. Keep it appropriate – you don’t want to be a downfall to your man. Or build a playlist on YouTube of funny Christian stand up comedy videos. This can be a great late night, post-kids activity.
25. Download a “for your eyes only” app like Couple and invest time in each other through every single day. There are dozens of ways to use Couple from fun and flirty to sweet and charming. Search “love quotes for him” on Pinterest if you need a few ideas to get you going, but then try to come up with your own loving things to say.

Now that you’ve read through our list here is a challenge for you: Imagine for a moment, what would your relationship with your husband be like if you did one or two of these ideas every single day for a month? Would you be closer, would he move into the spot of number one best friend? I think so! And he would be blessed, adored and genuinely loved along the way.

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Shirley

Shirley spends her days fulfilling her purpose of biblical homemaking and motherhood. She is wild about her husband, Paul, who shares her passion for encouraging young marriages. Together they are wading into a homesteading life on a few acres in south Georgia.

Latest posts by Shirley (see all)

• The Why’s and How’s of Choosing Homeschool Curriculum - April 26, 2016
• Life Verses for a Radical Modern Faith - April 4, 2016
• Marriage And Friendship – Practical Tips for Becoming Your Spouse’s BFF - March 30, 2016